The Never Ending Pessimist

http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/whole-life/features/23414-pessimists-never-win

So I just read this article from Relevant Magazine online (gotta love it!). There are always thought provoking articles that make me consider life, God, and who I am as a person.  The article linked above got me to thinking about what it means to be a pessimist. (I recommend this as a great thought provoking read)

That got me to thinking:

Why choose optimism over pessimism?

The article basically a discussion of the difference between an optimistic frame of mind versus a pessimistic one. Optimists usually see certain situations as an obstacle to overcome rather an an immediate defeat. Optimistis prefer to see life through a lense of hope rather than doubt and immediate negativity. Pessimists on the other hand are very distrusting (at least it seems to me) of positive thinking and pretty much expect the worst case scenario. They usually see things as not only a moment of defeat, but in some ways defeat that leasts well into perpetuity. They tend to beat themselves up.

Then I realized, I'm probably the co-captain of Team Pessimistic. And I first realized how pessimistic I was when i was in about the 7th grade.  It's something that comes very natural to me.  I prefer pessimism over optimism. Let me tell you.

As crazy as it may sound, I'm not a big fan of optimism. There's a certain amount of dillusion that I'm not accustomed to. I'd rather prepare for the worst or be emotionally numb that expect a positive outcome. The reason why is because usually the negative happens and I've been disappointed countless times that I don't to take the chance on being crushed yet again. Not necessarily the best way to live, but it's a whole lot safer than taking too many chances on too many things that prove to be worthless or maybe not the best fit.

I guess you could say I'm a "cautious pessimistic." I'd rather prepare for the worst and wait and see what will happen. Sometimes I hope to be proven wrong. But the majority of the time I know something's not right. Self-preservation is my main concern. Whether it comes to relocating, starting a new career, networking, or what have you. I don't like to "put myself out there" just like the next person.

So pessimism is my drink of choice and I don't really want to get another.

A bit sad if you think about it, but I'd rather be safe than sorry.

I've had to apologize way too much over the past few years.